Tuesday, June 4, 2013

When You're Needy

Do you ever hear a song that resonates to your very core? You can’t get it out of your head, you blast out your speakers when it comes on the radio, you find yourself singing it at random moments. That’s how I feel lately about the song “Lord I Need You.” Here are the lyrics:

Lord, I come, I confess

Bowing here I find my rest

Without You I fall apart

You're the One that guides my heart

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You

Every hour I need You

My one defense, my righteousness

Oh God, how I need You

Where sin runs deep
Your grace is more

Where grace is found is where You are

And where You are, Lord, I am free

Holiness is Christ in me
Teach my song to rise to You

When temptation comes my way

And when I cannot stand I'll fall on You

Jesus, You're my hope and stay

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You

Every hour I need You

My one defense, my righteousness

Oh God, how I need You

(The internet says Matt Maher wrote this. If that’s wrong I apologize.)

This song wrecks me every single time I hear it. I heard it in the car last night and found myself unable to sing along because I was overcome with emotion.

I love this song because it doesn’t pretend. It doesn’t say, “Lord, I’m good. I’ve got this. But once in awhile, I need you.” No. It says OH GOD, I NEED YOU. I won’t make it through this day, this very hour, without you. That word “Oh” conveys emotion. Not, “what’s up God, I need ya!” but “Oh, God. Oh, God, I need you.” Can you feel the depth of the emotion behind the word?

It’s slightly terrifying to admit you need someone. At least, it is for me. In my life I’m afraid the moment I admit to needing someone, they’ll disappear. Maybe I’m the only person who feels this way. But it’s precarious to put your trust in people. Eventually they disappoint you. Admitting you need someone—especially admitting it to that person—feels like taking a giant step off a cliff into nothingness. No one wants to be thought of as a needy person. Being independent and self-sufficient is valued and prized in our culture, and needy is the opposite.

But in God’s upside-down kingdom, needy is the thing to be. God wants us to live in constant dependence on Him. He wants us to reach for Him every hour. He wants to know every detail. We can’t be too needy for God. There’s no way to need Him too much. It sounds strange and backwards, but God designed us to need Him.

And so singing the words to this song is the truest thing I can say to God. I need Him. OH. I need Him. Every single hour. We have permission to express our deepest desire for God. There is no deeper need, and I sing this song with abandon because it is freeing to come before Him and admit that at my core, I am not okay apart from Him.

His invitation is comprehensive: we can bring Him all of our hopes and hurts. There is enough of Him to go around. There’s enough no matter how needy I am in a particular moment, and there will still be enough for the next time. There’s enough for you, too. If you don't know the deep, abiding peace that comes with knowing Jesus Christ, I would love to tell you about Him.


"Even to your old age, I will be the same,
And even to your graying years I will bear you!
I have done it, and I will carry you; 
And I will bear you and I will deliver you."
Isaiah 46.4